How retarded can you get?

Finally! I am back! I've been having problems signing in to post new rants, updates, and random shit since March. I blame Google. Boooo Google! But now, I'm back. Ready to rage again. >:-)

One thing that has been annoying me lately is the amount of junk mail we keep getting at work. It does provide me with some entertainment, though. How can people be so fucking retarded that they actually beleive people will open and read their shit? The one I like the best are the one that have subjects like "Emmo liks fwoihqbj". So I then ask myself "Did the person write a subject like that because they want to get past the junk mail filters, or are they fucking retarded?" I usually go with fucking retarded. Do you actually beleive people will open a message from someone who can't grasp the english language?

Another popular spam mail message is the one from some Nigerian piece of shit who's trying to scam you out of money. "Hi, I'm the last living relative of King Mook Mook Adji Blismen and I need your help to take care of this sum og 53 million dollars that I have in my account." Let me get this straight: you have 53 million dollars and you need my help? So all I have to do is give you my bank info and everything will be fine? Sure that doesn't sound like a scam to me. Here's my info. Should I bend over so you can fuck me in the ass even more? These people can be fun to fuck with though. For examples, visit http://www.ebolamonkeyman.com/

Next are the emails being sent about the miracles or penis enlargement patches. I have a question: why are so many people out there worried about the size of my penis? It's kind of a disturbing thought. Listen, just because you needed to enlarge your penis to fuck your boyfriend up the ass doesn't mean that every guy wants to have a large member. If it worked for you, good for you. Not everyone is as insecure as you are.

So that's the rant for this time. A short update on the rest of life:

- My girlfriend and I bought a house together and moved last April;

- My friends Andrew and Dawn are getting married in 6 weeks;

- Congrats to the Sens for an amazing run at the Stanley Cup this year. We'll get them next year;

- And the Maple Leafs still suck ass.

Until next time, it's good to be back.